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No other operating system can come close to the security, reliability, and efficiency of yours. With such an *obvious* choice, you stand speechless as a world of cretins choose other lesser OS's on a daily basis. The thick, murky ignorance swirls around you, while you huddle tenatively in the eye of the hurricane. How can one look upon that which is Linux and still workship pagan OS's? The answer may never reveal itself, but you can rest easy knowing that while you cannot control these simpletons, you can always make them feel inferior. The revolution will not be televised.

TYPE YOUR MIND (BUT DON'T BE A DICK)