Hey, baby, how's it goin'? Your name is ALICE, is it? That's a pretty name. You say you're from the LHC, and you know me? I'm intrigued. I normally have very discerning tastes, but your ample boson really accelerates my heart rate. You're truly irresistible… as if a black hole was pulling me towards you. Let's go find somewhere dark (it doesn't matter where) and do some colliding. Giggity.